Friday, January 28

Mr. B Silverman

Told me at Nationals

That I learned stuff from Ultimate that I can apply to my life.

He's said smart things before, so I figured that I should work this out for myself. What is it that I've learned from Ultimate, exactly?

How to:
- ignore the world.
- run through pain.
- read a defense.
- design an offense.
- break down an offense.
- take apart physical actions into their constituent parts.
- win arguments without getting into them.
- start arguments and walk away.
- trash-talk so tangentially that I can't not win.
- smile when I kick your ass.
- read the rulebook.
- catch things despite the pain they cause.
- read a disc.
- push people around without my hands.
- establish physical positions that are difficult to dislodge.
- throw the disc. Hard.
- reasonably good forehand and backhand form in racquet sports.
- use my freakishly long arms.
- not grasp what "on serve" means.
- not keep a team together.
- do a muscle-up.
- properly buddy-tape my fingers.
- run with a hangover.
- run while intoxicated.
- use the total hangover cure.
- smile as people stab you in the back. Metaphorically.
- feel athletically inferior.
- feel athletically superior.
- yell about nothing important.
- give my body away.
- be horribly disappointed by the inability of people to play by the rules they agree to play by.
- get into fights.
- get out of fights.
- run away from problems.
- laugh it away when my teammate tells someone to suck his nuts in a not-at-all joking fashion.
- share the toy.
- lose the game. Damn. Furf will have to call his mother after I tell him.
- spend my savings.
- relate everything to ultimate.
- drive all night, play all day, drink all night, play all day, drive all night.
- lie to myself.
- become more cynical.
- pivot.
- throw with my left hand.
- do yoga.
- give up on my teammates.
- not believe in everyone.
- overmatch overmatched novices in league play.
- know what tabatas are.
- accept that when I speak with people, that they aren't usually listening to what I say.
- disappear from parties/gatherings such that no one notices until I'm gone.
- rent a car for cheap.
- fall asleep on your couch at just the right time so that even if you kick me out, I'll have gotten enough sleep.
- sleep on the floor.
- sleep without sheets/blankets/pillows.
- sleep the cold away.
- sleep the heat away.
- sleep the pain away.
- conspicuously&studiously not know the score.
- get up at insane hours to save $$ by skipping a night in a hotel.
- pretend I like shitty food that people cook.
- not bother to interact with teammates.
- not call attention to bad company.
- accept that sometimes I'm too tired to drive.
- not determine which animals should or should not be eaten based on intelligence.
- let someone tell their story even if you know it is uninteresting.
- type daily on something pointless.
- write a blog.
- recognize that all frisbee players don't all play frisbee.
- give up on r.s.d.
- play at an all-night hat tournament.
- be late unabashedly.
- not throw to girls.

I've learned that I've lost my momentum here.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Nice. Crossfit references, not throwing to girls, and college ultimate.